Tuesday, October 18, 2011


This is my third post within twenty-four hours, but I have been having the worst time sleeping lately and sometimes clearing my mind helps. This might not turn into a very coherent post but I'm going to give it a shot.


I honestly think that people get in their own way sometimes. I was talking with my director and a couple of one of the actresses' friends the other day. The friends were a gay couple from Las Vegas who had been in their relationship for more than ten years. And my director, who was also gay but was significantly older than the gay couple, absolutely mortified them. He was talking about "fags" and about how gay people had no morals and it was so hard to tell whether he was even being sarcastic. The two men from Vegas just stood their, eyes wide open, shocked and completely offended. The worst part was my director didn't even realize it.


I met a woman the other day who impressed me just by the way she dressed. It was with such style and a style that was so uniquely her own. She was a woman, probably in her fifties, who said that she had made the discovery twenty odd years ago about what clothes she looked good in and damn if she didn't look good. She wore a pearl necklace, pearl earrings, black pumps, men's-style pinstriped slacks, a men's-style blazer and dress shirt, and a fedora. And damn it was an evocative picture. She probably would have gotten some weird looks walking down the street (in any town but this one anyway) but she knew what she liked and was clearly happier for it.


I'm not sure I ever want to make the statement that my viewpoint/world view/whatever is correct. I'm not sure if I honestly ever believe that my paradigm is correct. Yes, gay people should be allowed to get married. That is true and that fact is correct. I acknowledge that, but just stopping there isn't really correct either because polygamous people should be allowed to get married, to as many people as they choose.
People should be allowed to have kids or not have kids. People should be allowed to get married or not get married; do drugs or not do drugs.  It's their own damn lives, stop interfering.

 But I guess ultimately what I'm getting at is that I feel like saying: I have the correct world view, I don't need to listen to other people is just harmful.  As a kid I believed that monogamous, heterosexual relationships were right, only because that's all I had ever experienced.  Once I discovered that my babysitter was gay and in a serious relationship and that two of my mom's friends were gay and had been together nearly twenty years, I realized that heterosexuality wasn't the only option.  Similarly, once I learned the polygamy wasn't something that only occurred in fundamentalist Mormon relationships, I realized there was nothing wrong with it at all.

I guess what I'm saying is that I'm still learning.  I'm always going to be "still learning".  There is always going to be a more enlightened, more equality centered belief system out there, so I want to keep hearing other people's opinions.  I want to know if I've offended someone, so I don't offend people in the future.

I suppose that some of my beliefs are probably "correct", but I'm just not comfortable saying that.  That's probably a bad thing, maybe I'm just silly.  But I think saying: "People deserve to be treated equally" is more important than saying: "I'm correct"

On a somewhat related note: I will however, always respond better if you say: "Here's what I took offense to and how you could say it better", rather than saying: "You're wrong, I'm right.  Now listen to me."

My thoughts on this subject rather strongly rather remind me of this SMBC comic: http://www.smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1726#comic (and yes I've linked to SMBC twice in one day, Zach Weiner can thank me for the potential six extra hits I'm giving him).  Sorry for not embedding it, but this post is already long enough.


I think that was mostly coherent.  It was certainly scattered, but I do think I got my point across.

No comments:

Post a Comment